I have to confess. I missed the birth of our second child. Not like, I had to sneeze, I turned around and there she was....like she was 5 weeks early and I was on a trip and didn't make it back in time....AAAGGGHHHHH!!!!
In the grand scheme of things...now that I'm here and have held my baby girl and seen for myself that everything is OK I think I'm over it. I mean...what does she care...she's just wants to know why she now has to work to eat and where the Yanni like ocean noises went. But for a while, I was carving myself atop the Mount Rushmore of worst parents. From left to right...Travis Henry, Lynn Spears, Michael Jackson, & Me.
But then I got to thinking, as I'm sitting there thanking the good people of American Airlines for doing everything within their power to stop me from returning to Austin, including not letting my row of the plane board until it was 2 minutes before takeoff because it was dirty (I'm not making this up)...there had to be at least 5 things worse than missing the birth of your daughter...right?
1. Showing up to the father daughter dance as drunk as Shooter in the movie Hoosiers yelling random Harry Carry quotes...twice.
2. Attending parent teacher conferences in nothing but a yellow polka-dot thong
3. Tatooing "daddy's girl" backwards on her forehead so every time she looks in the mirror she'll know how much I love her.
4. Pretending to have a British accent for the first 13 years of her life and then during her Bat-Mitzvah speach, switch cold turkey and tell her we're actually from France, not England.
5. Call Jose Canseco and have him swear that I was at the birth and then accuse Ivy of "mis-remembering" when she questions me about it later.
So...now I feel better. The whole world...or at least the 3 people (including my mom) who read this blog...know what a terrible father I am. But just think about how much worse it could be...and if anyone thinks it can't be...watch out for me wandering in from right field at your daughter's softball game...with no pants on.
Sunday, June 08, 2008
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6 comments:
Congrats guys on the new arrival. Can't wait for Zach to meet her.
Russ, don't worry, you're only worse than Travis Henry is with four of his kids. That means you're a far better father to Bryce and Ivy than he is to his other five.
Congrats! And Russ .. you are not the worst dad! Who knew Ivy was going to race Bryce for the earliest arrival! Must be the Jessel in her shining through already trying to show up her big brother!!
Love you all!
CONGRATULATIONS TO THE NEWMAN FAMILY ON THE BIRTH ON MY LITTLE GRANDDAUGHTER IVY. BRYCE IS NOW A BIG BROTHER.
MY LOVE TO ALL
NANA
GUESS THERE ARE MORE THEN 3 THAT READ THE BLOG. CAN'T WAIT FOR THE PHOTOS.
FOR THE RECORD RUSS, I THINK THAT YOU ARE A FANTASTIC FATHER AND PAIGE IS A WONDERFUL MOTHER.
Congratulations!
I think I'm still in shock! Obviously not as much as you guys (Russell!). Congratulations...she is beautiful!
Definitely more than 3 reading your blog!
Ivy is beautiful and we are thrilled for y'all and all of her grandparents!
With much love and congratulations,
Judy, Al & Uncle Dean
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